Raising Successful and Resilient Children
Joanne Stern, Ph.D., Family Wealth Preservation Consulting
Moderated by Stacy Mullaney, Global Head of the Goldman Sachs Family Office, Private Wealth Management
In a society where many view fame, fortune and power as primary barometers of success, it can be challenging to teach your children how to find wellbeing and purpose that help create a truly meaningful existence. Furthermore, children from wealthy families often struggle with feelings of inadequacy and increased pressure to succeed, making them more prone to depression, anxiety and substance abuse than their peers from lower income families.1
Joanne Stern, Ph.D., has decades of experience counseling affluent families, parents and teens. As a family wealth preservation consultant and the author of “High Performance Families: Preserving Wealth and Happiness for Generations,” she helps high-net-worth clients empower their children to make responsible personal and business decisions. She joined our In the Lead 2022 event to discuss how fostering parent and child dynamics can lead to a meaningful life for children.
The path to success starts close to home, Joanne said. Creating a foundation of empathy, respect and understanding within a family unit helps members develop stronger interpersonal skills. Greater communication leads to less friction in navigating intergenerational wealth and expectations.
Connect with your kids to share and shape your legacy
Consistently and intentionally becoming involved with your children and grandchildren’s interests can foster a strong generational legacy that leads to greater success and happiness. Involvement should extend beyond observing from a distance and it takes time, effort and interest, as Joanne said in her book “Parenting Is a Contact Sport: 8 Ways to Stay Connected to Your Kids for Life.”
“It can be a gift to be one of the close people your children and grandchildren want to talk with and listen to in their lives,” Joanne said. “Earning the opportunity to be their mentor, coach and guide while making legacy-defining decisions is a privilege, not a right.”
Parents can start by modeling the values they hope to instill in their children, such as building a resilient mindset to recover from setbacks. This positive reinforcement creates a meaningful sense of purpose in life for both parties, and this education prepares heirs to make responsible family and business decisions now and for future generations.
Give them tools to find their own way
“It’s a beautiful thing to be able to share our abundance with our children,” said Joanne. “It brings us great joy. But remember, of all the gifts you give them, one thing you can’t give them is a meaningful life. They have to work for it themselves and build it on their own.”
Although parents often demonstrate love by giving kids material goods, teaching them determination, patience and loyalty is a more effective way to help them develop tools for navigating their own lives. This includes actively listening to children’s dreams and hopes, which helps them build a meaningful life separate of acquiring material objects.
Show your children you value them
Joanne emphasized no one is a perfect parent and that “good enough is good enough.” If you ensure your children feel valued, provide a family system of stability and encourage positive self-awareness, then they will have the courage to spread their wings and soar.
If you would like to learn more about In the Lead or discuss these topics further, please reach out to your Goldman Sachs team.
This material is intended for educational purposes only and is provided solely on the basis that it will not constitute investment advice and will not form a primary basis for any personal or plan’s investment decisions. While it is based on information believed to be reliable, no warranty is given as to its accuracy or completeness and it should not be relied upon as such. Goldman Sachs is not a fiduciary with respect to any person or plan by reason of providing the material herein, information and opinions expressed by individuals other than Goldman Sachs employees do not necessarily reflect the view of Goldman Sachs. This material may not, without Goldman Sachs’ prior written consent, be (i) copied, photocopied or duplicated in any form, by any means, or (ii) distributed to any person that is not an employee, officer, director, or authorized agent of the recipient. This material is not an offer or solicitation with respect to the purchase or sale of any security in any jurisdiction. Investing involves risk, including the potential loss of money invested. Past performance does not guarantee future results. Neither asset diversification or investment in a continuous or periodic investment plan guarantees a profit or protects against a loss. Information and opinions provided herein are as of the date of this material only and are subject to change without notice.
© 2023 Goldman Sachs. All rights reserved.
Goldman Sachs & Co. LLC is registered with the Securities and Exchange Commission (“SEC”) as both a broker-dealer and an investment adviser and is a member of the Financial Industry Regulatory Authority (“FINRA”) and the Securities Investor Protection Corporation (“SIPC”).
© 2025 Goldman Sachs. All rights reserved.